Taxis and Tuk-Tuks

I’m honestly not sure why I feel the need to willingly put myself in situations where I know I will be riddled with anxiety, stress, panic, loneliness, guilt, and the like. I have it in my head that I need to prove something to myself. That I can feel like a normal, independent person who isn’t afraid of Every. Single. Thing.

What’s that, Al? Bo, Marisa, Roseanne and countless other people you know can travel the world solo, why can’t you? But let’s practice first in a place you are somewhat familiar, even if it’s not blind-friendly. Let’s go back to Nepal and see if you can be more independent, even though you know you are going to freak the f out when you are alone on a busy street, or in a taxi, or at a new and unfamiliar place. Let’s try to do things on our own without anyone’s assistance. Let’s try to be comfortable in our own skin for once in our life, shall we? Great, let’s go then.

So, yeah, this first week back has definitely been stressful. I knew it would be incredibly different from when I was here in the fall, since I was coming with no set plans and would have to be more on my own because I wouldn’t have the ELI staff taking care of me. But I NEED to learn how to live with myself, no matter where I am. If I can get over the anxiety of being alone on the other side of the world, maybe I can finally get over the anxiety I feel when being by myself in my own hometown. That being said, I still have yet to actually WALK anywhere by myself here. I’ve taken cabs almost every day, which is not good for my Fitbit stats. Or my waistline.

I have been volunteering every day at SASANE, the human trafficking NGO I wanted to work at last time I was here, but my plans were thwarted by the election, strikes, and other unforeseeable issues. My friend Ashish took me there the first day on his motorbike, so that was easy. And then I took a taxi home with Shanti, one of the SASANE girls who lives near Thamel, where I am currently staying. The next day, Shanti said I could go with her, but we would be taking a tuk-tuk, instead of a taxi, because it is so much cheaper. I’m all about saving money, and going with someone instead of by myself, so I was down. Just FYI, a taxi from Thamel to SASANE costs 200 rupees ($2 USD) and a tuk-tuk costs 17 rupees (17 cents). Those are some good public transit prices!

So, what exactly IS a tuk-tuk? The best way I can describe it is that it is a sort of small truck on 3 wheels, one in the front and two in back. You essentially sit in the bed of the truck, which is covered, and you get in by climbing through the small door/opening in the back and attempting to find a seat on either side of the truck bed. They are usually pretty crowded, and people don’t like to move, so you might have to crawl over people to get to an open spot. There’s no way more than 12 people could fit, and even that is pushing it. The ride is incredibly bumpy so you have to find a place to hold on and brace yourself to stay seated. Basically, it’s terrifying, and completely unsafe. I’m glad I can’t actually see what is going on outside amidst the traffic.

Most days, I have to take a taxi to and from Marisa’s apartment. Getting to SASANE is fine, someone from the apartment building finds me a taxi, and tells the driver the general area I am going (Dillibazar, near the immigration office). Then, when the taxi gets there, I call Indira at SASANE and she talks to the driver to explain where exactly to take me. Getting home, however, is a different story. Someone from SASANE finds me a taxi, and tells them to take me to Thamel Apartments. I have a business card that has a map with the location, as well as Nepali directions written on it. None of this seems to help. My 10-15 minute taxi ride has been no shorter than 35 minutes (sometimes closer more like 45-50), as the driver gets to Thamel, then proceeds to drive around, stopping to ask directions no less than 4 times as to the whereabouts of Thamel Apartments. It’s frustrating because I can tell that I am in Thamel and know we are driving past places that I probably know, but I just can’t see outside to tell if we are near any landmarks that are recognizable to me to assist the driver in finding the apartment. I’ve even called the guys in the office at the apartment to talk to the drivers and they STILL have trouble finding it. And it’s on a main road; it’s not hidden away or off a side street or anything. A few times, the driver has tried to tell me just to get out and walk the rest of the way. And I WISH I could get up the courage to get out and try to do just that. But I can’t. It’s scary enough for me to get out of the taxi once they FINALLY find the building, because they drop me across the street, which is very narrow, so I don’t have much of a street to cross, but with the incessant onslaught of cars and bikes coming down the street, I have to figure out a good time to jaunt the 6 steps in front of me to get to the building.

Moral of the story: I’m still not being completely independent, as was my intention. But I’ve decided that in a place like KTM, it’s probably better for me to be safe and stay alive than risk getting hit by a car/bike/bus/tuk-tuk/scooter, right?